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Words

'They were like sharp knives; and we were like the frozen meat in the refrigerator; they tried to cut us but we made them blunt.'
Those were his words, with streams of teardrops flowing down the swarthy tanned route......


  I couldn't deny that I did feel something, it tasted sour in me somehow, like something I had never felt before. Touched, desperate. It would be dramatic if I shed a tear at the moment, but I would really go for it if I still could, only if I had not lost the ability to do so.

  I was a failure, he was right that I couldn't do my job well, if only there were someone to my aid, to tell me what was right and what was wrong. But that was the past. I stroke a change since Shu talked to me. Pride should never be bigger than humanity. Indeed.


  I did think about quitting, but still I couldn't find the courage in doing so. He was actually the guideline that sabotaged my attempts, all the times he cheered me up and encouraged me. Even if it was so different in his heart, it was all sky blue inside; whilst mine was a fatal blackout.

  I promised myself to make him proud, so I would look up and cast a smile. The clock tower seemed unbelievably fabulous in the breezy air that day. The world is such wondrous if I can ever change the way I look at it. No one is perfect, nothing is god-like. The faith in myself, in others.... these are what I lacked of. How could I dare to disappoint him with my tragic habit that doesn't seem rare to me at all?


  I don't know if things are gonna change. She made me change once. That pride was replaced with chillax. That bond I still do crave, like how the champions did. A chained heart I had, with a lock that I once bled to seal. Back then I'd say: 'Words, how little they mean, when they were too late.' But now, for him, it'll be: "The key is hidden down the vein, and I'm dying to dig it up again."


By,
Euan Thum,
penned in mid-August 2014.
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